A side note....
I originally posted this entry in June 2013. I am re posting this entry because I received alot of responses and input. I want to bring you to the current events. I have stated that Col Kevin Landers had dismissed our children from his life as long as they were in contact with me. Recently, Kevin has re-engaged with our older son and older daughter. He did have contact with our daughter "A" in the summer of 2012 in Texas in an effort to bribe "A" to help his goal to prosecute me in the courts here in Mexico. It didn't work. As a matter of fact, the judge here in San Miguel along with the Embassy basically told Kevin and Melody to stop wasting their time on frivolous lies against me and John.
I originally posted this entry in June 2013. I am re posting this entry because I received alot of responses and input. I want to bring you to the current events. I have stated that Col Kevin Landers had dismissed our children from his life as long as they were in contact with me. Recently, Kevin has re-engaged with our older son and older daughter. He did have contact with our daughter "A" in the summer of 2012 in Texas in an effort to bribe "A" to help his goal to prosecute me in the courts here in Mexico. It didn't work. As a matter of fact, the judge here in San Miguel along with the Embassy basically told Kevin and Melody to stop wasting their time on frivolous lies against me and John.
Kevin is
getting ready to take on a new job in North Carolina and hopes that his
lies will not follow him. In an effort to do this, he and Melody are
trying to display on public media sites and to "new friends" that our
four children have been a part of their lives all along. It's a lie. I
have NEVER brainwashed my children against their father nor Melody. Our
children have chosen to not speak to Kevin nor Melody until now. Why?
Because their brother Justin is getting ready to join the marines and
the kids want to be a part of Justin's life after years of being alienated from him. Keep in mind that "K" "M"
and "A" had not seen or spoken to their brother Justin in more than 5
years.
Justin has been used as a tool by Kevin to control his siblings
and once Justin is out his fathers home, classic Col Kevin Landers will
bribe our kids with money, cars, vacations and, material items or
worse-"I won't love you if you don't abide by my demands" because he
does not know how to show love without manipulation. Please read
this entry below and understand that I am posting public facts based
from the internet. Think me a liar but truth speaks loud on these public
sites. So do our children, but the children are afraid to talk out-loud
because they fear their fathers anger. I can understand their fear.
Kevin will go to any lengths to hide his secrets and get his way no
matter who he hurts in the process.
I
cannot
paint a clearer picture in this entry as to how unstable, mean and
manipulative Col Kevin Paul Landers and his wife Melody truly are to the
children they claim they tried to protect. Col Landers in all
facts-threw his daughters and son away because they did not fit the mold
of the perfect family. Our children were becoming rebellious, angry and
withdrawn under Kevin and Melodys care for over years of me
forbidden(by Kevin) to not have contact with them. Kevin was embarrassed
of our children and their behaviors after our divorce but now that they
are healing and doing better years after he abandoned them-he wants
them back in his life so he can say "See what a great father I have
been."
It
will be said that our chidrens instabilities are because "I left them"
but as the truth unfolds everyday to the children, they see that Kevin
and Melody have lied to them all these years.
Please keep your eyes wide open when you encounter Kevin and Melody Landers. They are not what they portray themselves to be and they will continue to "hide" behind the children. Entry from June, 2013
As I write this next entry, I’m reminded of the shape of Wall Street & private companies and the shambles CEO’s have left them in as they depart. I’m reminded of the demise of our USA government & political offices & it causes me to ponder, “How in the Heck did they get there!”. I wonder how some priests ever became much less remained priest amongst all their abuses? And how a person like Kevin Paul Landers, Sr. continues to soar in the US Military (specifically US Army). Because I was this officers wife for over 18 years, I am extremely knowledgeable of my ex-husband’s abuses, negligence and lies. I am at a loss as to why a corporation/employer (the US Army) continues to “look the other way & turn their head concerning Lt. Col Landers’s obvious dysfunctions in his performance as a soldier, a husband, a father, an officer and a peer.
I want to begin
with Kevin’s dysfunction as a father and a husband and how obvious it is that
this man neglected & perverted his personal life. He runs on resentment and
hate. If you don’t do as he says, and act as he commands-you are nothing to
him. My children and I have felt shut down, beaten down and left to feel
unloved and alone at least once if not more than once by the temper tantrums
from Lt. Col. Kevin P. Landers Sr. Let
me share with you some public examples.
After Kevin lied to
the court & had our child lie to the court, he succeeded in obtaining physical
custody of all 4 children in July 2005 (the children had chosen to live with
me). He made it very difficult for me to have any contact with our children but
through the world wide web, family and loyal friends I was able to gather whereabouts
of my children’s location(s). Although he lied, stole
& cheated in an effort to gain possession of our children, he immediately
started discarding them as he realized I was not going to return to him…he
continues to use our children as pawns to try & silence me.
In this first article dated January 11th 2008, Kevin accepts a promotion and he claims 6 children.
“LTC Landers and his wife
Melody currently reside in Fayetteville, North
Carolina. He has 4 children, Kevin Jr, Megan, Amanda,
and Justin all of Fayetteville, and two
stepchildren, Kyle Wilson of Fayetteville, and
Kayla Wilson of Big Springs,
West Virginia”-
8
months later, Kevin accepts command of the 4th Engineers Fort
Carson, Co. In this article, Kevin claims 5
children.
“Landers is married to the former Melody Wilson of Grantsville, West Virginia. They have five children: Kevin Jr., Kyle, Megan, Amanda and Justin.”
I acknowledge that errors & oversights occur but honestly, how
could the number of children and the name of a child be mistaken? This is a red
flag in the household of Lt. Col. Landers and his wife Melody.
So let me continue further to show you that there were no mistakes
in the details of these articles. These articles were approved for printing by
a man that is bitter because his mentality as an abuser is to turn away anyone
that acknowledges my existence. US Army officer Kevin Paul
Landers wants people to hate me because I hold his secrets. When any of
our children
refused to denounce my existence, Lt. Col. Landers would put them out of
his
home & into government funded (free) facilities. My children were
begging to have contact with me and to silence them in an effort to hide
his secrets and lies-he tried to hide them from society and me. This
way, Kevin could lie about his own children and me without rebuttals and
do what Kevin Landers does best-Damage Control. He would proceed
to tell the people that inquired about his children that use to be in
the "happy family portrait" that the kids were having emotional problems
because of the divorce but the bottom line is the children were having
emotional problems because they were to act as if I never existed.
This "family" portrait below was made and hung on the wall within months after I was forced out of my children lives. I know this because once the children were in my life again-they started to share the stories of what life was like with their father and Melody. If you look closely, it appears Kevin is not wearing a wedding ring but my computer resolution may not be as good as some.
Our divorce proceedings barely started and Kevin is living with a woman, and insisting that our children accept the fact that this woman (Melody) that they hardly know-is going to be their new Mother. According to my now adult children-they shared that Kevin told them that Melody was going to be a better mother than I ever was and that they better accept that fact without questions. What children wouldn't have rebellious behavior or emotional issues after being told something like this by their father? My children told me they had to secretly cry because if they said one word about me their father and/or Melody punished them by yelling, degrading or locking them away. Once again-how can any logical person not see how unstable Kevin Landers behaivor is? He had or has no desire to raise our children. His goal in our divorce was to "win" but once he "won" our children-he left them behind while he pursued what he loves best-himself. All he cares about is-Kevin. No matter how much he has to lie, cheat, manipulate or abuse-his goal is to take care of himself.
Once the kids were secure within facilities, he would ignore them. By that I mean, he had NO contact with them. He supplied no emotional, verbal or financial support. Our daughters M and A begged for their father to speak to them. M in particular, would asked her father if he would give her permission to graduate early from Job Corps because she was excelling rapidly. His response-"M, you only contact me when you need something." Really Kevin?
Here is the
daughter that he manipulated into breaking into our kitchen window to
try to steal court documents and then had her lie to a judge on his
behalf? Then, after he didn't need her help- threw her away in the world
with no support what so ever. A came next. So, conclude that the bottom
line is-Kevin hates women even if they are his precious "little girls"
Here is a video that was recorded on January 11th, 2011 at my home here in San Miguel de Allende. My daughter "A" was already living with me and John. "M" had just graduated from Job Corps and wanted to live with me. These two sisters were forbidden to see or speak to each other in over 4 years by the demands of their father Col, Kevin P Landers, How much crueler can a father let alone a human being be? We did not tell daughter "A"that her sister was coming just in case Kevin tried to prevent daughter "M" from living with us. He did try but "M" was of legal age to choose and she chose to be with me.
I have all the emails and hateful responses to both of his daughters that he so carelessly threw away into the world. The allegations of drug abuse and lying by his 2 little girls is Kevin's written excuses in the emails to ignore his daughters. A tactic he used on me as a grown woman-his wife. Really?? An abuser, cheater, and swinger that happens to be an officer, father, and claimed christian that is acting self-righteous and continues to as long as society allows him.
This "family" portrait below was made and hung on the wall within months after I was forced out of my children lives. I know this because once the children were in my life again-they started to share the stories of what life was like with their father and Melody. If you look closely, it appears Kevin is not wearing a wedding ring but my computer resolution may not be as good as some.
Our divorce proceedings barely started and Kevin is living with a woman, and insisting that our children accept the fact that this woman (Melody) that they hardly know-is going to be their new Mother. According to my now adult children-they shared that Kevin told them that Melody was going to be a better mother than I ever was and that they better accept that fact without questions. What children wouldn't have rebellious behavior or emotional issues after being told something like this by their father? My children told me they had to secretly cry because if they said one word about me their father and/or Melody punished them by yelling, degrading or locking them away. Once again-how can any logical person not see how unstable Kevin Landers behaivor is? He had or has no desire to raise our children. His goal in our divorce was to "win" but once he "won" our children-he left them behind while he pursued what he loves best-himself. All he cares about is-Kevin. No matter how much he has to lie, cheat, manipulate or abuse-his goal is to take care of himself.
Once the kids were secure within facilities, he would ignore them. By that I mean, he had NO contact with them. He supplied no emotional, verbal or financial support. Our daughters M and A begged for their father to speak to them. M in particular, would asked her father if he would give her permission to graduate early from Job Corps because she was excelling rapidly. His response-"M, you only contact me when you need something." Really Kevin?
Here is a video that was recorded on January 11th, 2011 at my home here in San Miguel de Allende. My daughter "A" was already living with me and John. "M" had just graduated from Job Corps and wanted to live with me. These two sisters were forbidden to see or speak to each other in over 4 years by the demands of their father Col, Kevin P Landers, How much crueler can a father let alone a human being be? We did not tell daughter "A"that her sister was coming just in case Kevin tried to prevent daughter "M" from living with us. He did try but "M" was of legal age to choose and she chose to be with me.
I have all the emails and hateful responses to both of his daughters that he so carelessly threw away into the world. The allegations of drug abuse and lying by his 2 little girls is Kevin's written excuses in the emails to ignore his daughters. A tactic he used on me as a grown woman-his wife. Really?? An abuser, cheater, and swinger that happens to be an officer, father, and claimed christian that is acting self-righteous and continues to as long as society allows him.
A little over a year later, in 2009, another article was posted. This
article reveals that Lt. Col. Landers is willing to claim NOT 6; NOT 4 but now
only 4 yrs after having obtained physical custody of our children, their father
has “put 4 of them away”. In 2009, he only claimed 2 children: J Landers & Melody’s son Kyle Ray. How can the US army not
question the stability and integrity of a solider that does not even claim his
own children publicly or privately? I do believe that in Kevin’s mind, moving
to Colorado
would enable him to “start anew” where he could lie to a new audience. How sad
it is that he would not acknowledge & would lie about 3 of his own children
& Melody’s daughter.
“The Landers' reside in
Fort Carson, Colorado Springs, CO with their two sons Kyle, 17, and Justin, 12.”Col Landers now only claims 2 children
In an effort to start over, Melody and Kevin decided to create
their own business called Kyles Home Health Care. A business in name &
photo’s only.
above: Melody, Kyle & Kevin
Our Family
In the Kyle’s Home Healthcare website, once again, only two children’s
pictures show up-Kyle and Justin. What about Kyle’s sister that adored every
breath he took? Why was she not honored as also being a part of a miracle in
the life that Kevin and Melody claim they want to live? What about Kyle’s other
siblings (my & Kevin’s children)?” I have heard wonderful stories shared by
my older children about how sweet and funny Kyle was. Where are the pictures of
the siblings that became a part of Kyle’s day-to-day life in July 2005?
The words “Our Family” does not apply to those that refuse to lie
on their father’s behalf. Does it seem strange that there are no pictures of
the other children? If a father is not going to claim his 3 other children and
his wife is not going to claim her only daughter, then why should the US Army be
upset when their Lt. Col. Landers chose to ABANDON his post & troops in
Afghanistan! It is understandable to have a strained relationship with one
child that is a young adult. But Kevin not only denies one child - he denies
the existence of 4 of his 6 children! Can
the military and the public in general not see that this man, husband and
father has a lot of internal issues.
Within a year’s time, Lt. Col. Kevin Landers and his wife Melody
went from claiming 6 children to acknowledging ONLY two sons-Kyle and J.
What happened to Kevin’s oldest son-K.? Where are M and A?
What happened to Melody’s daughter Kayla? I can answer those questions and so
can Kayla, K, Jr., M and A. But the one child that has much to say
but has not been permitted to speak out or allowed to maintain contact with his
siblings is the one child that sat back in a dark corner crying and watching
his siblings being verbally abused and kicked out methodically one by one. That
child is the ONLY child that did not have a choice because of his age. The
child that had to say goodbye not once, not twice, but several times to the
siblings that refused to allow the hate to continue by their father; a child
that was not allowed to speak, exist, or breathe without permission from his
dad. Let alone, talk about his mom or brother or sisters. A child that is now 8
years older than in 2005; once an 8 year old that has matured into an almost 17
year old young adult. Yet he, J, is still terrified to pick up the phone
or computer and try to contact any of us without his controlling father’s
permission. This Lt. Col. father that lost control over me; lost control of his
oldest son; lost control of his two daughters. Kevin lost this control because
all 4 of us stood up to him and refused to be abused any longer. Our son J
(he will turn 17 in September this year) has not been permitted physical
contact with his immediate family for 8 years because Kevin Sr. decided that it
would be best “for Justin” to: Forget about his mother; Denounce the older brother
that he adored (6yrs difference in age); Have nothing to do with his 2 older sisters.
Although daddy beat me out of the relationship and kicked his other 3 children
out of his life, Lt. Col. Landers insisted that J MUST forget about all 4
of us because, “They left us and don’t care about us. They don’t love you the way we do
and all of our lives are much better
without your mother and sisters because they tell lies about me.” Lt. Col. Landers
professes to all that will listen, “Your mother is trying to ruin my career!”
Kevin has a history with me and our children of treating us like garbage, and
then in classic manipulator form, crying on the beaten down person’s shoulder
as he (Kevin) tries to justify to himself & convince others that HE is the
true victim. This act does have success with one that is scared, hurt & lonely.
I observed his game often & can spot it in its infancy. Observation &
studies indicate that the abuser is weak, mean and insecure. They only prey on
ones that are vulnerable which includes young children-my children.
It is important to set up a clear, honest picture of how a man
that portrays himself as a “honest”,
“accountable”, “fair”, “caring”, “respected”, “responsible” man/soldier can be
a mass manipulator that only cares about one thing in life-himself.
So having said that
let me continue with my writings about how one man can abuse a system if that
system allows him to do so.
Anymore, our
leadership seems to have become more about seniority and not performance. Of
course with every situation, there are always exceptions. For instance, I personally
know of two officers that stand above many of those with equal rank. Both of my
younger sisters(Debbie Milhorn and Sue Benson) husbands are exceptional military officers. These officers are very recognizable and are respected
on their own merits. My brother-in-laws stand stable and respected for their performance
as sons, brothers, husbands, fathers and soldiers. These two men (both officers
in the US Army) take care of their families with pride, protection and love. They
transfer these same attributes to the troops that serve with them. These outstanding
soldiers that have to share a
rank with Col Landers who doesn't deserve to be in the same “arena” as
my sisters husbands. It's quite
frustrating and disappointing to them, their families and soldiers
because all are well aware of Kevin's unmeritable life with me, our 4
children and the soldiers that don't respect him yet under the ranking
system-must keep their mouth shut-or else. It is evident that Kevin
leads his troops the way he leads his children and wives...shut up-OR
ELSE!!
“In the military there is no
distinction between conduct in personal life and that of the military life. The
two are one.” Military Code of Ethics | eHow http://www.ehow.com/about_6825168_military-code-ethics.html#ixzz2WZFGhaD4
It is unfortunate,
that our country has embrace the mentality of, “the pursuit of power at any
cost including the abuse and neglect of our colleagues, peers, communities and
worst yet, of our own children…success at any sacrifice!” What is happening to
integrity, pride and accountability? Where is the feeling of accomplishment
that comes from making an “honest living”. How can one find fulfillment knowing
that their successes and promotions are bogus & not warranted?
In every high
ranked position or company, there are certain ethics that are expected. As a society, we are starting to lose the
expectation that people are to earn excellence through hard work, honesty and
respect. Respect from their families; respect from their peers; respect from co-workers;
respect from one’s competition. In this case, respect from the soldiers you
command as well as your peers & upper command. No matter what position one holds, the ethics
are universal, simple and obvious. Yet
my frustration is that we are losing our pursuit of accountability for leaders
that abuse their rank and power.
“In my 39 years in the military, I have learned that you
are not a profession just because you say you are,” he said. “You have to earn
it and re-earn it and re-evaluate it from time to time.” General Dempsey
As an Army officer’s
wife, I am very familiar with The Code of Conduct and Ethics. As you all know,
I left my ex-husband on Monday January 17, 2005 after years of abuse. We had lived
a secret life behind the walls of our homes and our children witnessed years of
verbal hate and physical beatings/abuse of their mother at the hands of Lt. Col.
Kevin Paul Landers. I had been raised to “stand by my man” period. I agree that
I should & would perform my responsibility to support, protect and stand by
my man-my solider. I did my best for 18 years to protect Lt. Col.
Kevin Landers in an effort that would
allow him to appear to be one of integrity, accountability, respect, caring,
fairness and promise keeping. Yet Lt.
Col. Landers chose not to control his anger. Anger directed towards me and our
children. I knew that I had to make some
changes or all of us were headed for disaster. I feared that I may not wake up
one day after a classic episode of rage because Kevin hates himself. After a
“typical” beating, with blood coming from my nose, and hand prints embedded on
my neck, I asked Kevin (who at this time was in a panic crying state – he panicked
when I lost consciousness from his strangling me) as he cried and held me
stroking my forehead with a wet cloth, I asked, “Why do you beat me?” Without
missing a tear, he said, “I see orange”??? Back then, I didn’t know that no
matter what I did to try to please Kevin, he would never be happy with me, no
happiness with his kids nor has he found fulfillment with himself.
The only time that
Kevin appeared to be happy is when things were going his way. I knew Kevin had
anger issues but I truly thought I could help him control his anger if I would
just do what he asked... “Stand by your man” at any cost was expected and I did
the best I could. Unfortunately, this perverted relationship has caused my
children to conclude, “Dad will stop if you (mom) will stop…(whatever demand
his current mood presents)”.
I questioned what
role Kevin thought I should perform. “What can I do as Kevin’s wife to make him
happy?” When I asked him this question, he immediately took this as an
opportunity to share with me his “late night work” of surfing porn & video
chatting with other men & women. I was devastated and felt humiliation. It
was at this time that I was introduced to my husband’s porn addiction. Now I knew what role he wanted me to play as his
wife. I longed to make him happy & decided to support and please him at any
cost. You can refer to my blog entry called “Swingers” for more detail. Kevin
has stated that he NEVER surfed porn and states that all the things I write
about his sex addiction is a lie. However, I have the hard drive to the
computer he used to surf porn. Screen shots of him exposing himself to women
& men. Photo’s of others doing the same, along with names, locations, etc.
I can produce all if ordered to do so.
In 2005, Kevin
tried to break into our home in Fayetteville,
NC after I was granted a
restraining order against Kevin. He was going after a few things but primarily the
hard drive. I have hours and hours of
Kevin’s infidelities and addictions
“Anyone who approaches an abuse situation with the notion that somehow through kindness and love, through behavior changes by victims, etc., the "good part" of the abuser can be reached and appealed to, needs to step down off of their high horse and just stop it! Stop giving advice to victims of abuse. Stop counseling abusers or even listening to them. This kind of thinking is foolishness at best and rank arrogance at worst. And it is dangerous.”~ Jeff Crippen
I am reminded that
sometimes there is no good in people. Sometimes people are just mean and if
they appear to be nice what is their motive? Is their motive to truly try to
apologize for their evil ways and rectify the pains they’ve caused others or is
the motive to try to “trick” or manipulate others in an effort to achieve a
selfish goal at any cost. A “cost”, including stomping a loved ones heart over
and over again.
As John’s father once
said to me when I could not grasp WHY my ex was and is still so hateful, “Sometimes
there are just mean people in this world and we will never make sense of it.
Mean is just mean. It can’t always be explained.”
Kevin does not care
if I or we think he is mean, UNLESS it affects his career or ambitions. If he
starts to be exposed, as I have done with this blog, he goes to great lengths
to
(1) Try to bully me to stop talking by taking me to court with his 5 inch binder of lies, or
(2) play the victim to his peers, family, township or worst of all his kids. Kevin has and continues to display typical behaviors of an abuser.
One of Kevin’s main characteristics of a classic abuser is that he blames everyone else for his anger, abuses, neglects…pretty much does not take accountability for anything. And when confronted with “no way out”, it’s because of the “orange”. He has tried to convince society that I was unstable and he had to protect himself.
Note that Kevin has never denied beating me. But he justifies it in a court order. According to Kevin’s falsified court order filed February 17th 2012, he states that I would throw things at him, antagonize him and he “may have restrained me physically” in an effort to protect himself. A typical excuse by an abuser, “He” had to beat me in an effort to protect me from harming myself or him so punching me in the face, slamming my head against the wall or throwing me across the room was acceptable? Keep in mind that my children knew of his abuses. Kevin also states in this court order that because no police reports were filed it clearly proves his innocence. What terrifies this abuser the most is that our children witnessed beating after beating…too many for them to count. After conversations, some counsel and support our children know that a man should NEVER strike a woman; a man should never strike his children in anger; heck a person should NEVER strike another…ESPECIALLY a person that is an easy target – a 180# officer punching, kicking, choking, raping his 125# wife. Good example Lt. Col. Landers. Sad.
(1) Try to bully me to stop talking by taking me to court with his 5 inch binder of lies, or
(2) play the victim to his peers, family, township or worst of all his kids. Kevin has and continues to display typical behaviors of an abuser.
One of Kevin’s main characteristics of a classic abuser is that he blames everyone else for his anger, abuses, neglects…pretty much does not take accountability for anything. And when confronted with “no way out”, it’s because of the “orange”. He has tried to convince society that I was unstable and he had to protect himself.
Note that Kevin has never denied beating me. But he justifies it in a court order. According to Kevin’s falsified court order filed February 17th 2012, he states that I would throw things at him, antagonize him and he “may have restrained me physically” in an effort to protect himself. A typical excuse by an abuser, “He” had to beat me in an effort to protect me from harming myself or him so punching me in the face, slamming my head against the wall or throwing me across the room was acceptable? Keep in mind that my children knew of his abuses. Kevin also states in this court order that because no police reports were filed it clearly proves his innocence. What terrifies this abuser the most is that our children witnessed beating after beating…too many for them to count. After conversations, some counsel and support our children know that a man should NEVER strike a woman; a man should never strike his children in anger; heck a person should NEVER strike another…ESPECIALLY a person that is an easy target – a 180# officer punching, kicking, choking, raping his 125# wife. Good example Lt. Col. Landers. Sad.
"Abusers lack empathy
which is why they can bloody your face and throw you a towel in disgust –
“Clean yourself up, you are a mess!” They will never admit fault for
your pain, because you – according to them – “Brought it on yourself!”
Abusers are very capable of fake empathy, especially when the abused
threatens to leave them. The false tears only serve to melt the heart of
the abused, and the cycle of torture will repeat itself. This is how
the crazy making stage begins."
Kevin knows this and he knows that the kids
understand this. He cannot bully our kids into silence anymore because of their
ages & lack of dependence on his “orders”. But abusers like Kevin will
always find antics to protect the lies they continue to live by. Kevin’s
biggest fear - now that our “young adult children” are free to speak – is their
voices that confirm the “Family Picture” I have blogged. Voices that he silenced
as minors…voices he continues to try to silence with unfulfilled promises of: financial
assistance with college, cars, payment of future weddings, all paid joint vacations,
down payments for a home…and then the worst of all – you can see/talk to your
brother if you silence your mom & help me expose her “lies”. I call these
“The Bribes of Silence”.
“…you can have someone who is intensely competent, who is steeped in the
skills of the profession, but doesn’t live a life of character.” General Dempsey
It has also been
stated by Kevin’s wife that Lt. Col. Landers is suffering from Post-Traumatic
Stress Disorder (PTSD) caused by “the war.” Hence, he has severe anger issues
according to Melody. I would dare say that Kevin may have or will try to
convince his peers, family and children of the same-“War has changed me…I have
anger and abuse issues because of my battlefield exposure.” I do agree that the
horrible acts in war do have unimaginable effects on soldiers & I know that
PTSD is legitimate and a huge concern for our men & women. BUT, please keep
in mind that civilian Kevin Paul Landers of Hicksville, L.I. New
York started beating me in 1987…well over 2 years of beatings were
taking place before Kevin in 1989 joined University of Georgia ROTC. As a matter of fact, according to the Dept.
of Veterans Affairs (http://www.ptsd.va.gov/)
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and my personal experience in helping others
with PTSD, this disorder can occur following a life-threatening event like
military combat, natural disasters, terrorist incidents, serious accidents, or
violent personal assaults like rape. In
our 18 years of marriage, Kevin never experienced any of these. Being that 15
of my 18 years of marriage included the US Army, I supported officer Landers through
every deployment. I was involved in family support groups and saw first hand
what facing combat close up can do to a solider and family. Kevin never faced
any combative situations or imminent dangers in the 18 years we were together.
The only deployment in our 18 year marriage was when Kevin was part of
Operation Restore Hope. We were stationed at Fort Benning,
GA under Col. Robert (Larry) Davis’s command. However, no deaths,
shootings, or the “theater of war” ever occurred in Kevin’s company. It would
be very insulting for Lt. Col. Kevin Landers to dilute other soldier’s
experiences of tragedy by comparing his decision to beat women & denounce
his children as being a result of PTSD & combat. No matter how one tries to
justify Lt. Col. Landers behavior, this/his behavior is NOT becoming of an
officer. Not the measure of a man -period.
It is common and
well documented knowledge that after I filed for divorce in 2005, Kevin
eventually was given command of the 4th ENG.
(engineers) Fort Carson, CO and there were unfortunately casualties
within his unit/command. I note these casualties because I want to acknowledge
my awareness of my children’s father being in harm’s way since their parents’
divorce. However, Lt. Col. Kevin P. Landers needs to be very careful in blaming
circumstances for his treatment towards his children. Lt. Col. Landers carried
his lack of leadership within the household with him to the volatile
environment in Afghanistan…perhaps it was a “orange” sighting that prompted Lt.
Col. Kevin Paul Landers, Sr. to abandon his troops In 2010 while being the
commander of the 4th Engineers, Fort Carson, CO.
FACT
according to
this news article written by family members from the 4th ENG Batallion,
it is a direct slam against the role as commander by Lt. Col. Landers.
Please read comments from very distraught families and soldiers in below link-
Please read comments from very distraught families and soldiers in below link-
You can quickly assess
that the families of the soldiers Lt. Col. Landers was suppose to protect were
very upset with his leadership and selfishness. According to the news, Lt. Col.
Kevin Landers arrived 2 weeks prior to the planned return of himself & the 500
troops under his command…he left behind his troops (.) Lt. Col. Landers left
behind the very soldiers that followed him into combat!
The comments on
this article caused a lot of turmoil. In their “5 inch binder”, Kevin &
Melody claim that I set up fake accounts and all 23 comments were from me. The
US Army is a small enough community that I am quite certain Kevin’s peers can
determine the truth of these articles. Once again, abusers will go to any
lengths to manipulate and lie to hide their true colors.
Having said that, no
apology or explanation was issued; nor were there any logical excuses for this
commander to abandon his troops. How can the military continue to allow this US
Army officer to wear the uniform and excel in a military that prides themselves
on “taking care of their own”; “An Army of one” – unless you’re Lt. Col. Kevin
Paul Landers? Sickening.
“Some wonder whether its top officers have forgotten the lessons of
Bathsheba: The crown of command should not be worn with arrogance, and while
rank has its privileges, remember that infallibility and entitlement are not
among them.”
Kevin Paul Landers, Sr. is paid to be a
leader. He is paid to be respected. He is paid to play a role as a soldier
leading soldiers. Kevin does well performing tasks he is being paid to do. At
one time I claimed Kevin to be a good soldier even though he lacked in the
unpaid role of husband & father. Yet
with his 2010 “troop abandonment”, he has proven to be an unworthy
officer/soldier as well.
One may ask, “Catherine, who are you to judge
what Kevin’s qualifications are?” I have answered that question in this
entry.
So, here I end with this paragraph. Our
military leadership is to be based on the below attributes and are required of
the US
military & its members:
Honesty, Integrity, Accountability, Fairness,
Caring, Respect, Promise Keeping, Responsible Citizenship, Pursuit of
Excellence
Kevin has not
proven that he is capable of any of these. His pattern of abuse, lies and
continued slander against me and his kids is obvious.
I know Kevin very
well. Better that anyone. I was married to him for 18 years. I can predict his moods, his moves and
his motives. He currently is working towards a new position and he will go to
any lengths to ensure that his lies are not exposed. His tactics will once again
include an attempt to use our children in an effort to “protect him” by
convincing them that he was the victim all along. I dare say that as I write
this, in Kevin’s mind, he is already planning on blaming Melody for all the
horrible things that happened to our children after I was out of the picture. I
can hear him now, “I had no idea what was going on because I was always
deployed”; “Melody has a lot of psychological issues and I didn’t know that
when we married”; “I just love you so much and I am sorry Melody was so mean to
you”; “Your mom really hurt me when she left me for ‘Uncle John”. Blah Blah Blah-
Melody has never
had legal say in any of our 4 children’s lives. My daughter’s could have not
been sent away from facility to facility without their father’s approval. There
is not one power that Melody has or has ever had to determine the suffering my
children endured during these past 8 years. Their misery was at the hands of
one person- their father. Hurt per the choices of a father that only contacts
them when he needs something. My children do not understand how far their
father will go to try to use them to help him gain a goal…he will turn on the crying
while on his hands and knees professing his victimization. Oh how I have seen
him do that time after time after time. He does not stay on his knees long. He
is like a wolf crouching for the next hunt. All that come in his presence need
to keep their eyes wide open. Do your own background check on his history
(personal & military). Beware. You have been informed.
A recent side note as of 2014:
Kevin and his wife Melody are trying to convince society that our children were aloud to have contact all along but they chose not to. I can produce emails where our children begged their father to permit them to speak to each other and me. Col Landers is a mass manipulator and if all else fails, he threatens to take our now adult children to court if they speak openly. He is the meanest, most unstable man I have ever met.
A recent side note as of 2014:
Kevin and his wife Melody are trying to convince society that our children were aloud to have contact all along but they chose not to. I can produce emails where our children begged their father to permit them to speak to each other and me. Col Landers is a mass manipulator and if all else fails, he threatens to take our now adult children to court if they speak openly. He is the meanest, most unstable man I have ever met.
REST...REGROUP...RETURN
I just stumbled across this blog and I have no idea who you are or the people that you are talking about but it is obvious that you are nothing more but a crazy jealous ex wife that is so obsessed with your ex husband and his new wife!! You really need to grow up and re read the stupid stuff you say.. I feel sorry for you. I didn't think that anyone could possibly be this crazy.. I've read a lot of blogs.. But I have to say that yours brings crazy to a whole other level!! Just saying
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